Professor Matti's Revenge

Chapter 2- The Man in the Mirror

Have you heard about the man in the mirror? They tell me that I'm crazy, that he's nothing but a figment of my hyperactive imagination. But I've seen him. I see him all the time. He sneaks up on me when I least expect it. Its as if he ambushes my reflection. And then he just stands there and looks at me. With his hollow eyes and his stupid crooked grin. He sort of looks like me. But not quite. He has dark bags under his eyes, no doubt from his lack of sleep due to his tormenting of innocent unsuspecting mirror-viewers. His hair is wispy and wild; obviously he is too busy with his mischievous tirades to keep it properly groomed. His face is shaped like mine, but the combination of his untamed beard, his double chin and his pale complexion makes him look more like my doppelganger who just so happens to be a self-loathing hermit with no mind for presentability.

I don't like the man in the mirror. He mocks me all the time. He tries to imitate my every movement. I can hardly brush my teeth in peace, without him trying to mimic every stroke of my toothbrush, as if just to piss me off. Doesn't he know how off-putting it is? And sometimes when I just need to go look at myself, when I am getting ready to go out or for whatever other reason, he just appears there, and stares blankly at me. No expression on his stupid face. I'm sure he gets a lot of sick pleasure out of poking fun at me like that. At first I just ignored him, but as time went on I began to get more and more peeved by his antics.

I must get rid of him. But how does one rid himself of something that cannot be touched, something that is not a tangible being of flesh and blood, but something which is nothing more than an annoying moving picture which exists in another dimension, and hides behind an indestructible glass window ? I bet if I close my eyes he would just go away. But no, that's not good enough. It's MY MIRROR dammit!! Why should I have to sacrifice my right to unconditionally admire myself, just because some idiotic phantasm decides it likes nothing better than to screw around with me?

I think the problem is my own Image. He definitely looks like me, but he obviously lacks my confidence and strength of character, and my forceful defiance. Perhaps this is why he is so easily displaced by this trickster, without even putting up much of a fight. Yes, I'll need to toughen it up, this reflection of mine. It might not be easy. Since my image draws its strength from me, I will have to dig deep into my soul to extract the necessary powers he would need to copy, to be strong enough to put the trickster in his place. He will need to be exceedingly sure of himself, defiantly so. He will need to recognize that the world of wrong-sidedness is HIS dimension just as the real world is mine. And he has to learn to protect his territory, like a fearsome tiger who don't take no shit from nobody, especially a no-good hyena with tiger-stripes who feels he can freeload wherever he likes. My Reflection definitely needs to step up his game. After all, he is representing ME, and his weakness doesn't look good on my part, since I am the one held accountable for his actions, or lack of action.

Can you hear me, Man in the Mirror? Have your fun for now; soon, you will learn that you are trespassing on private property, the penalty for which is eternal exile to the abyss. There can only be one man in the mirror, and that can only be the one which reflects everything that I am, that I resemble, that I represent, and that I stand for. The man in the mirror can only be me. So pack your bags and get ready to go............